Sunday, 13 May 2012

Shining right where it's needed

I’m always saying in my descriptions of my portfolio career that I’m creating something that is nurturing all of me. Yesterday I found out that perhaps that wasn’t 100% true yet because I’d been forgetting about some of the parts of me or some of the parts of me had forgotten that they needed any attention at all.  

The 30 day challenge asked a very useful question the other day- 'what are your strengths?' and after answering relatively easily and (sometimes feeling that I was giving answers that assumed that what I do now is what I’m good at) I didn't know if I was looking deeply enough. But once I was done and I’d updated the 30dc community, I was not getting the direct feedback I wanted, impatience set in and I wondered maybe something about me is missing that chance to be noticed. Wealth Dynamics came into the conversation and after hearing descriptions of each type I wondered – am I a Star in Creator's clothing?!

After deliberating- but not for long- I took the test and discovered I was indeed a STAR + creator+ supporter! Ha! Surprise!! Good surprise? Hmmm, not 100% sure yet, but it’s definitely a great chance to discover what it means to be a Star in this context. I know it’s not necessarily the same as all-signing, all dancing stars that hog all the limelight.

Last night, I had a chance literally thrust upon me to learn more about what it means for me …I innocently went along to a family gathering with older relatives that I hadn’t seen in a long time… with a glass of wine in one hand and laughter in the room I watched as a fiddle and bow was lowered and balanced on my lap.

The room fell still as a group of expectant eyes watched my reaction…’come on then!?’ they questioned silently and then out loud. Nerves washed over me and I started to shake a little at the thought of performing in front even this small and familiar audience. I noticed though that I was happy to have a fiddle in my hands again after 2 ½ years of no practise.

Five minutes later I was playing along imperfectly with my dad and his cousin’s husband…with a huge smile, enjoying being in the ‘band’ and being with like-minded souls…2 hours later I was exhausted but itching to play more. 

Musical star Jaimie is very happy!

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